Having declared that the Olympic logo for London 2012 spells the word "Zion", threatening to withdraw the Iranian Olympic team from their first brush with western democracy, President Nodinnajaquet of Iran has now declared a fatwah on many more western symbols.
First to face the wrath of the peasant president is the humble crucifix. A spokesman for the president said that it bore too much of a relation to the infidel Catholicism, a religion which the Ayatollahs have declared is far too pro-Christian to be tolerated in Iran. It has also lead to the banning of Colonel Saunders and his bow tie, which the president's office felt looked too much like a cross for comfort.
Also, from next month, all toilet seats have been banned by the president, as when placed in the downwards position, they are very similar to the infidel symbol for "female".
Flight operator Virgin has been banned from landing at Tehran Airport unless '72 planes can be guaranteed to land together' in order not to insult the memory of Iranian martyrs.
The Iranian Department for Food has banned McCain potato products, as they are considered advertisements for the infidel American senior politician John McCain. Also politically affected are Ford motor cars, the thought of which immediately bring Iranian women wailing to their knees in their burkas being reminded of the infidel American president Gerald Ford.
And Lady Ga Ga has been banned because even the Iranians aren't that dense.