Scientists testing French frogs and tadpoles have found that pollution is having a strange effect over the frogs.
'They are becoming intersexed' said Prof Bromide from the Sorebum 'there is a real mix up and no one knows who the men or women are. Sometimes they are both and sometimes neither. We have neuter frogs, bisexual frogs, both at the same time frogs and even frogs with testicles that become so irritated that they have to be scratched non-stop.'
The problem starts with French tadpoles who are particularly sensitive to pollution and develop bizarre traits as young a five days old. They begin to cry for no apparent reason and are not happy until they are sucking away at soft objects.
A crisis in French culture is now on the cards and President Sorecosy has begun examaning women other than his wife to see how many have been developing unwanted traits. To date he has reached the 100 mark but is still far behind his rival Silky Burlysconi who recently passed the 1000 mark for just one year of research.
A froggie kiss is now to be avoided if you want to keep your teeth intact.