Written by queen mudder

Print this

Monday, 31 January 2011

image for Powerful Martian forces align with Sun, Moon and Neptune for apocalyptic Chinese New Year start
The cyber malware is upgraded from a 1990s Energiser Bunny virus

Hong Kong - (Bunny Boiler): Thursday's Chinese New Year of the Rabbit sees bellicose war god planet Mars fire up the Aquarius trifecta of Sun, Moon and Neptune.

The alignment is seen with trepidation by superstitious Hong Kong city sources who warned today about a possible implosion of powerful hidden computer viruses.

Most feared is the rampant myxomatosis virus that affects warren-like bank account structures designed to fool Inland Revenue probes.

"You can expect rampant myxomatosis to affect mortgage-related banking scams," Cotton Tail University Professor of Sub-Prime Scams Dr Einstein Flintstone said today.

Also called the fork bomb or rabbit virus the cyber malware opens applications such as cmd.exe so many times that its overloads computer processors.

Originally designed in 1990 the virus was first tested in Macau's Seizures Palace Casino under the influence of an eclipsed Full Moon on microprocessors operating the Energiser Bunny.

Subsequent upgrades during Spring and Autumn equinoxes saw the malware reclassified as a powerful hacking tool that best operates following a solstice.

Last December's lunar eclipse and the January 4 solar equivalent saw the King Kong Ping Pong banking giant's balance soar to new levels of corrupt profitability.

The move resulted in UK Deputy Prime Monster Nick Clegg demand a break-up of banking behemoths involved in decades of fraud-related British property scams.

Westmonster Homes-for-Votes gerrymandering supremo Mrs Thatcher is 109.

Make queen mudder's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 2 plus 2?

7 20 4 1
59 readers are online right now!

Go to top