Tehran -- In a startling turn-around, Muslim religious leaders today called on US President George W. Bush to help "Reign in those religious Fundamentalists who espouse violence 'in the Name of Allah." "Attacking and killing people has never been done in the "Name of God, Allah, Yahweh, or any other Supreme Being" agreed Greg Laurie, pastor of Harvest Christian Fellowship in Southern California.
"The third commandment, "Thou shalt not take the Lord's Name in vain" doesn't refer to an occasional "God damn it!" when you hit your thumb with a hammer, says Laurie. "It's claiming that it's somehow in Allah's name to wage war, commit murder, or incite others to do so, and claiming that these acts are the "Will of God." They aren't, and never were said Laurie.
Referring primarily to Pat Robertson, the Imams accuse American fundamentalists, including Atlanta bomber Eric Rudolph," of being "as bad or worse than Islamic jihadis when it comes to not respecting the sanctity of life." "Now Pat Robertson, supposedly an ambassador of God, calls for the outright murder of Venzuelan president Chavez."
The Christian Broadcast Network's "700 Club" seems to attract an enormous audience of ignorant fundamentalists who believe that rebuilding Solomon's Temple in Jerusalem, in the process destroying a Muslim holy site will speed the coming of the apocalpyse. "And for some idiotic reason they think that will be a good thing," said Imam Wojohowiz. "Blood will," according to Revelation, "flow six feet deep in the battle of Armageddon. Eeewwww!"
Why Robertson has targeted his wrath on Chavez is unclear. In the past, the United States has backed numerous South American dictators including Noriega, and even Fidel Castro. In a notedly un-ecclesiastical fashion, Robertson used energy and financial justifications for his desired asassination: "It's a whole lot cheaper than starting a war ... and I don't think any oil shipments will stop."
No mention was made of saving souls, or anyone getting "born again" in Robertson's rant."
In Caracas, pro-Chavez legislator Desire Santos Amaral said of Robertson, "This man cannot be a Christian. One of the Ten Commandments is "Thou Shalt Not Murder" and yet that's exactly what he's calling for. When he comes before the Lord on Judgement Day, he's gonna have some 'splainin to do."
Venezuela is the world's fifth largest oil exporter and a major supplier of oil to the United States. Messing around in the internal politics of oil-producing nations seems to be in the blood of Robertson, and voters on his side of the red:blue divide.
To his defense, Robertson has also said that feminism encourages women to "kill their children, practice witchcraft, destroy capitalism, and become lesbians." "If that doesn't confirm that this man is nuts, and should gagged and bound for his own good, I don't know what would."