Hawaii Governor Neil Abercrombie had to put the state laundromat on full spin cycle as he was forced to admit he couldn't produce Barrack Hussein Obama's birth certificate despite claims he was ready to produce it to end Birther's contentions once and for all.
The new governor, elected in 2010 after 2 decades as a very liberal Congressman, opened up the controversy last week saying it was important to put claims that Obama was born in Kenya to rest prior to the run up of the 2012 elections.
Claiming he met the Obama family in 1959 when Barrack was two years old, he first claimed he was there for the birth, but later had to recant that claim when it was discovered he hadn't even moved to Hawaii at the time.
His next claim was that he had seen a "notation" on state records of a birth pertaining to the arrival of Barrack Hussein Obama , but had not seen the actual document, which he promised to locate.
One week later, he indicated that he had not been able to locate the document, but was
going 'to keep on looking.'
In a press release issued today by the governor's spokesperson, there was no further mention of the document, but a statement from the State Attorney General that birth records were private, and could not be released without the person's consent.
Investigators on the case, despite being stalled at every step in their search for the truth, have indicated that it was possible for Obama's grandparents, who took over the raising of
the mystery child, could have simply filed a record of birth, but not a valid birth certificate, after the fact.
"There is no question what we have here, " said International Investigator Martyn Lewis, "it's
the first immaculate conception since Jesus!"
Meanwhile, the President stays 'mum' (sic) on the matter after allocating over $900,000 in legal fees to suppress any records concerning his birth, education, student loan payoffs, mortgage documents and child support payments allegedly being sent to over 12 children on 4 continents.
Said Lewis, "Like father like son...those Obama boys did get around, in a mysterious kind of way! Amazing how big the Obama family tree is, roots everywhere, those guys just
seem to come and go all over!"