Written by ronin47empire
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Saturday, 22 January 2011

image for Bangalore Bandh Jan 22, 2011: A Spot of Violence to Truly Appreciate Peace Rest of the Year
People who wanted to work couldn't

A small band of the minority community (Thugs) have indeed caused some trouble in this laid-back city surrounded on three sides by reality and on the fourth by Mysore. Parts of KR Puram and Yeshwanthpur were shut down by roving cells of 3 men. But in other parts like Koramangala nothing changed.

The important facts of the Bangalore Bandh that was called on January 22nd.

Why: Because the un-elected governor allowed two lawyers to sue the chief minister who has a shaky majority.

Where: Bangalore: A vast city which has 5 times the number of people as the nation of Qatar. 70 fahrehheit is cold and 80F is considered hot. Home of India's IT boom. So, all in all, a cool place to live.


Bangaloreans: A generally laid-back people aware of the fact that they're surrounded on three sides by reality and on the fourth side by Mysore. This spirit is epitomized by the new colony of Koramanagala with lots of expatriates, IT children, service industry professionals who milk the first two good, law abiding middle class people and eunuchs at traffic stations who milk all of the above.

Thugs: Inspired by the worst Indiana Jones movie ever made, they use religion, politics and especially a combination of the two to rake up trouble whenever given the chance. They grow everywhere.

However, one survey conducted by AVX Shenoy showed that 80% of Koramangala respondents just found out the name of chief minister and governor of Karnataka.

"In their defense Bookanakere Siddalingappa Yeddyurappa and Hansraj Bharadwaj are not easily memorisable names," said Shenoy.

One resident of RT Nagar proudly declared there was no bandh. "Coffee Day (the Indian Starbucks) is open, what bandh?" said pretty (and) witty Nikki(26).

A microbiologist from Hyderabad suggested that BSY should just do what some clever people in neighbouring Andhra Pradesh did to their governor: show his naughty MMS with a call girl on TV and send him home to his underdeveloped district still 20 years away from "inventing" indoor plumbing.

Barring stray incidents of stoning all was well. The Chief Minister held a press conference and congratulated everyone on not getting anything useful done all day. "The Chief Minister accused the Governor of behaving like the leader of the opposition, and then proceeded to behave like the leader of the opposition," said noted 8th grader and mindry.in analyst Thabish.

Nothing was heard from the actual leader of the opposition. Sources believe he's applying for GMAT this year in an attempt to get a real job, since there are too many takers for his present job. And tomorrow's expected to be business as usual in Koramangala and elsewhere.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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