Written by Ellis Ian Fields
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Wednesday, 24 November 2010

image for Pope's Position On Condoms Still Not Clear

Despite being welcomed as a step in the right direction, the Pope's relaxation of the Roman Catholic church's total ban on contraceptives has still left questions unanswered.

Last week, Pope Benedict, surprised observers world-wide by suggesting that condoms may serve a purpose in reducing the risk of HIV infection and the spread of AIDs.

However, some Roman Catholics - especially in South America - are keen to have further clarification on the use of the prophylactics.

Said Columbian coffee exporter and businessman Manuel Gabriel Manchega y Montoya: "His holiness has removed a great burden from some of our brothers.

"But what he has not made clear is the church's position on the use of these devices for the transport of certain substances - like, er, coffee - across international borders.

"Sometimes the best and most cost-effective way for these goods to be kept safe is in a condom safely inserted in a 'mule.' Surely, His Holiness can see the sense of this process and give his blessing?"

Señor Montoya has never been convicted of any drugs manufacturing offences, nor has it ever been proven that he is the head of any drugs cartels.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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