Michelle Obama, socially challenged when it comes to gifting visiting or host leaders of the free world, found herself perplexed again when it came time to pick some gifts for her latest host, the PM of India.
With her husband in tow, including the two kids and a reluctant White House Dog, Bo, and an entourage consisting of the Strategic Air Command and the entire Mediterranean Fleet, and ALL THAT PACKING, Michelle was said to have had a tough time bringing some representative gifts to host Dr. Monmohan Sigh.
According to Michelle's protocol secretary the first lady settled on a case of Charmin Extra Soft Toilet tissue with little blue birds on it because, "those poor Indians have more cell phones than toilets over there," and another reason a personal private toilet would be packed on Air Force 1.
Following up her healthy diet mandate for 'people of colour' she picked a choice selection of fresh vegetables and legumes from her victory garden including kale, chicory, sweet potatoes, and collards. "That should keep them regular,' she was overheard saying to the staff of gardeners.
As a personal touch Michelle had the girls draw some 'Indian Art' for her host showing a crowd of people with turbans, and red dots on their foreheads bowing down to Air Force I as it landed on the tarmac.
In a more humanitarian effort, Michelle had 12 dozen Birkenstock Scandals in a variety of colours, mostly brown, and in a selection of sizes boxed and gift wrapped saying, " I would have bought them some Jimmy Choos...but those people have awfully big feet from going barefoot all their lives....!"
To round out the presentation , Michelle sent her aide out for $100 gift cards from Wal Mart and Target saying, " they can probably buy some nice 100 thread count sheets and pillow cases over there to make some dresses....it's the least I can do!"
"By the way," she said to no one in particular as she was getting ready to depart, " does anyone know if these FOLKS wipe their arse with their left hand or their right..............?"
American Tourists. You gotta luv 'em.