Written by P.M. Wortham
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Topics: Money, Iran, Hamid Karzai

Monday, 25 October 2010

image for Hamid Karzai Has Fingers in Everybody's Pocket

Admitting to press earlier this past Monday, representatives of the Afghanistan government under President Karzai, report receiving money from the Iranian government. Referred to as "transparent financial aid" and received in the form of cash, Karzai can apparently do whatever he pleases with the money.

Inflamed at the announcement, U.S. foreign secretary, Dewey Cheatum released his own response at a White House press conference this morning. "Apparently Mr. Karzai doesn't quite understand what a pay off is", said Cheatum. "The American people expect some exclusivity and some action from a world leader when we buy them off".

Karzai's representatives countered the strong language from Cheatum saying, "We appreciate the American contributions to the improvement of our society, but clearly we are willing to accept cash from anyone."

Karzai could not be reached for comment, reportedly under a full agenda this week including the management of all his personal real estate holdings, a visit to the Gulfstream company to sign his final ownership papers and a visit to the Bentley factory to drop off the gold bars to be used for plating his spoke wheels. Karzai's secretary commented, "Hamid likes his bling".

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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