Written by Monkey Woods
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Topics: Pope, Australia, Saints

Sunday, 17 October 2010

image for Pope Names First Australian Saint
How long before we have a Pope Sheila?

Pope Benedict XVI has officially recognised Australia's first saint, Mary MacKillop, a Melbourne-born nun who worked with needy children more than a hundred years ago.

Saint Sheila was canonised, not sodomised, with five others, including Brother Andre, a Canadian monk credited with miraculous healing powers.

MacKillop, who died in 1909, clashed with senior clergy and was briefly excommunicated, in part for exposing a sex-abusing priest. These days she'd be called a bore, and told not to bother!

The six saints were sodomised in St Peter's Square in front of some 50,000 people.

Among those attending the Mass were hundreds of Aussie nuns from the order MacKillop helped found, the Sheilas of St Joseph of the Sacred Heart. One of them, Sheila MacSheilason, said:

"Fair dinkum to 'er, Bruce. She wuz a lavvly Sheila! We'll all be celebrating tonite, and having a fair few tinnies down the boozer! Yer welcome t' join us, mayt, y'barsted!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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