Written by Sidney Bollocks
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Wednesday, 13 October 2010

image for Australian child carer good to go
"Ha, now who's frightened?"

A Brisbane child carer, Sheila Box-Jellyfish, who was convicted of assaulting handicapped children in her care, has sensationally won an appeal which allows her to continue working.

In separate incidents, she tied one child to a toilet and beat him with a fly swat. In another incident, she held a child down while a colleague rubbed chilli around the child's mouth.

The chairman of the government appointed quango, which heard the appeal, reinstated Ms Box-Jellyfish's blue card, saying that he could see no evidence that either child suffered any ill effects from their experiences. He also said it was a credit to her that she wanted to continue to work as a carer. Ms Box-Jellyfish's own children were not present to support her at the hearing, as they are currently in the care of the state.

Meanwhile, Ms Box-Jellyfish has been appointed as the new Commissioner for Child Safety.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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