Written by anthonyrosania
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Thursday, 30 September 2010

image for Viral Video Shows Herd of Cows Derailing Train: "Six down," said the engineer. "Four to pick up the spare."

A video that has gone viral in the last day shows, from an engineer's point of view, a commuter train travelling at 75-85 MPH, colliding full-force with a herd of cows attempting to cross the tracks.

At least six of the bovine interlopers were immediately killed, and the train was derailed.

"T-Bone, porterhouse, chuck, roundeye, shank, fillet mignon, cube, flank, ribs, sirloin, salsbury, del monico," said a spokesperson for the railroad. "All that delicious steak flying around & I'm eating Dollar-Tree tacos on the coach in my mother's garage, FFS."

While certain animal rights organizations were up in arms, the crowd of people that descended upon the horrific scene --to help those in the train, and to help themselves to butcher-fresh beef treats-- had plenty to say.

"I see that some died," said one by-stander, who clearly doesn't have a job, girlfriend, or anything else to f--king do but talk to reporters. "What happened too the udders? BWAHHH HA!"

"They were Hindu, right?" asked another loitering a--hole. "They deserved it."

"Bullseye!" said that first a--hole. "What a 'cow'tastrophy! Don't be a 'cow'ard. Will the conducter be charged with a moooooving violation?

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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