Written by Noddy Bigears
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Topics: Pope, Catholic

Tuesday, 10 May 2005

Flanked by President Bush, French President Jacques Chirac and German Chancellor Gerhard Schroeder, Putin accompanied by virtually all other World leaders, listened to a rousing speech by Pope John Paul II and Stalin condemning mass murder, violence and genocide by political leaders and promoting individual peace initiatives everywhere.

The Pope started the speech gently saying "As you build a free and democratic World, the dead will forgive you and will rest in peace with you" to the cheering crowd. He continued, "By extending freedom to those who have not known it, you will advance the cause of freedom and you will advance the cause of peace."

However, at this point, Pope John Paul II started a more uncompromising angle to his speech declaring "You greedy self motivated egotistic scum are driven by your own self righteousness, you have neglected the rights and needs of the individual and their humanity driven by vile political greed, your own ignorant vanity and probably worst of all, your total inadequate incompetence as World leaders and statesmen."

President Putin and the others started to physically recoil and show signs of total fear as they noticed thousands of dead soldiers started to march into Red Square and block all of the potential escape routes available to self selected & elected elite of the political World. In the distance, they could see millions and millions of dead soldiers and civilians massacred during the World Wars walking towards Moscow gradually surrounding the city.

Stalin required no warm up for his unabated rage declaring "Only total cretins cannot learn from the history of mankind. You have neglected your souls and must be punished and suffer in Hell in eternal damnation for ever, you have been collected here today so that we can wash away the political faeces of mankind into the gutter of Hell so that humanity is freed again in the World." In a booming voice that echoed across the Red Square, he commanded "Leaders of the victors and the vanquished united, you may now proceed to the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier which leads underground to your justly appropriate endless and timeless purgatory."

Pope John Paul II closed the celebrations declaring gently to the weeping political leaders "You may rest in peace once you have paid for your sins due to the immense pain and suffering that you have caused and tried to continue to create in the World."

An eerie silence descended on Red Square as the steel door of the tomb clanged shut as the last of the evil poisonous politically lost souls had been led away.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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