Written by IainB
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Wednesday, 8 September 2010

image for World's Shortest Man title at risk
The original holder of the World's Shortest Living Man record, Napolean was disqualified upon his death

Edward Hernandez is currently the world's shortest man, standing at a mere twenty-seven inches tall. With the title came the job offers and lucrative sponsorship deals for children's clothing.

However, the Columbian dwarf's title is under threat from a Nepalese teenager, Khagendra Thapa Magar, who turns eighteen this month, and will take the title from Hernandez as he is a mere twenty-two inches tall.

"I'm quite worried," said Hernandez. "Being so short is not much fun at the best of times, with people constantly picking me up and tickling my tummy, even after I've pointed out that I'm twenty-four. Should I lose the title, then the film deals and personal appearances will dry up as the short-arse industry turns its attention to Nepal."

Hernandez, who comes from a long line of short people, has already considered cosmetic surgery to remove a few vertebrae, but discovered in time that cosmetic enhancement would immediately disqualify him from the title.

"I was left with only one option," said Hernandez. "I've been sending doughnuts laced with human growth hormone to Magar. I'm hoping he puts on a bit of a growth spurt in the next couple of weeks."

The previous holder was Chinese midget, Pingping, who was apparently so short, he could only be viewed through the wrong end of a telescope.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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