Written by shea lo
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Topics: India, Pakistan

Saturday, 21 August 2010

image for Pak asks India to "send lamb korma, chicken biryani, mutton kebabs and stuffed garlic naan" in food-relief package but requests "hold the poppadoms"

Paki 'govt' and Army-intelligence officials were shocked to discover that Hindu-India food is even tastier than some local culinary dishes. Evidence: the first India food packages sent to flood victims were appropriated & voraciously 'tasted' and devoured by the 'guys in charge'.

Your reporter was told by the finger-licking Chief:

"Of course we had to taste the food first to make sure those Hindus were not trying to poison us"

Angry Indian MP Lollu-Ballu - Minister for Adulterated Flour and Spices immediately demanded India cut off all dialogue with Pakistan

Thanking India for its aid packages the ruling sufficiently-satiated, belly-full elites made a special RUSH request for: lots of meaty-nutty biryanis, fatty korma curries, thick mutton-dhaal redolent with fried onions, spicy kebabs, all varieties of stuffed naan and 3-layer ghee-parathas.

The new Paki Minister in charge of Menu Requests from India-Aid sent a desperate SOS to the India-Aid HQ:

"HQ are very much liking your Hindu food. It is finger-licking good. You infidels are surprising us. Attached please find urgent triple-order for Bombay Biryani, Hyderabad lamb, Deccan chicken and Delhi korma. Please make sure to use only white flour for naan and top with lots of ghee. Please cut out wholewheat flour and low fat veggie dishes - just stick to highfat meats.

PS: please add cases of Kingfisher beer to wash this down"

India was told Pakistan F-16s were on standby to fly into New Delhi's food pick-up zone.

The Pak Govt had earlier rejected the food packages returning them without tasting. But starving Paki soldiers and fellow militants on the Line of Control dividing Pak from India had hungrily torn them open and devoured the contents to lip-smacking sounds of delight.

Earlier Hillary Clinton had told Pakistan she was a great lover of Indian food and in her honor top Indian hotels carried a special "Hillary Menu". She warned Pak that they had a choice:

"You're either with Indian food or you're going to be bombed back to a good ole American Krispy Creme deep fryer"
.

Osama bin Laden and Mullah Omar had also given the go ahead for "Hindu" food as 9 years of living on Spam and Coke has been debilitating. A salivating Osama said:

"I've been sucking back the opium and man it's given me the munchies. I'm sick and tired of nothing to eat and those damn Hindus can sure cook up a tantalizing feast"

A starving Pak ISI grudgingly declared:

"We are ready to accord them most favored nation trading status so they can open India Kitchen franchises all over Pakistan. But please hold the poppadoms OK?"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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