Rome - (Papa Bullshit): In Old Testament days it used to be called loincloth shunning.
And this weekend it's really got up the Pope's nose as the relentless Italian heatwave continues to fry the Papal bollox - er...brain! - to oblivion.
An announcement in the Vatican Nioozy of the Scroozi redtop has commented on Pope Joe Ratzinger's conviction of impropriety taking place under the cassocks.
His frenzied ex catheter - er...ex-cathedra! - Papal edict instructs those trusty Vatican morality sleuths the Swiss Guard to root out the evil practise of altar boys going commando.
Also on the banned list are the wearing of thongs and rubberised split-crotch y-fonts - er, Y-fronts! - as well as any lewd or lascivious undergarments mocking religion.
A spokesperson for the Altarboys Union said today that it sounded like the usual Friday frisking ahead of the Pope's poker night was being replaced by randy - er...random! - ad hoc fumblings.
Papal 'housekeeper' Sister Ingrid Stampa is a right raving loony.