Kabloom, Afganistan - Al Quaeda and Taliban members have recently hit upon difficulty in getting members to believe in the alledged audio tapes of Osama Bin Ladin. The upshot is they are becoming less and less inspiring to recruits, especially the younger generations and women.
"He's just sooo creepy looking anyway," said one girl, "I mean he looks like father time or something."
"He told me he had a burka built for two for me to try on," said another, "We need somebody we can respect, someone young and exciting, we need Lady GaGa!"
While AlQuaeda is not a democracy, several members have been sending twitters to the pop diva in hopes she will consider their plea to give them new leadership.
"It is out of the question," said a spokesperson for Lady Ga Ga, "She is entirely too busy for football. Please tell these little people to quit their tweeting."