Written by Charpa93
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Topics: China, Bra, Nipples

Sunday, 4 July 2010

image for Poor Chinese Inventor Receives International Grant to Produce 'Nipple Bra'

MAINLAND, China - It's not every day you have a man thinking about how to take the stress off a woman's nipples and liberating them, but that is precisely what a male Chinese inventor by the name of Hung Low Le in the small town of Chengdu has on his mind. And he's doing it with a grant from an international group known as "Hand Up, Not Hand Out" which was set up to help poor inventors bring their ideas to fruition.

Le got the idea after watching hours upon hours of Chinese Newscasts and noticing that the women reporters were increasingly showing serious nipple action through their tight shirts after being exposed to the arctic-like temperatures in the studios that their male counterparts assured them were necessary to alleviate underarm perspiration. The women were forced to either not wear a bra beneath their shirts or wear a bra that bound the nipples tightly.

Being a scientifically-minded person, Le immediately thought the pressure from the added bumps against the unyielding bra cups were probably making the female reporters a bit uncomfortable.

That is when he got the idea to invent the "nipple bra," which is essentially a regular soft-cup bra with strategically placed small protuberances to allow the nipples breathing room when a woman becomes chilled or excited.

Le used this analogy in explaining why he invented the nipple bra. "Would a question mark be a question mark without a dot at the end? Would an exclamation mark be as effective without the dot at the tip? So too is the way I see a woman's breast. Without the nipple, it is just a mound of flesh, it has no meaning. Regular bras make the form look unnatural. I have invented the nipple bra to liberate women, so that they can show their nipples anywhere, anyplace, anytime without the stress associated with binding bras."

So far, the nipple bra has not caught on as quickly as Le had hoped with Chinese women and he claims he cannot understand why they are not lining up and thanking him for his contribution to their comfort as well as his reverence for the beauty of their nipples. "Sometimes," said Le, "there's just no pleasing a woman!!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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