The real ones are pretty f-cking creepy as well. About 100 professional clowns marched with big, floppy shoes through the Salvadoran capital Thursday to protest the killing of a passenger by two imposter clowns.
The real clowns, who panhandle on public buses in and around San Salvador while dressed like John Wayne Gacey, were upset that a man was shot five times when he declined to give money to two assailants dressed as clowns who boarded a public bus. Police released a sketch artist's rendering of one of the assailants, which led to the savage police beating of Sideshow Mel, of Springfield.
"I thought it was all part of the act," said a witness. "When the first clown fired his gun, a red flag that said "BANG!" flew out of it. Bullets came out of the second gun, and that wasn't funny at all.
Clown-union leader Tippy The Wonder Clown, also known as Carlos Vasquez, says he plans to issue IDs to all real clowns and urge police to detain those who do not have them. The ID cards will be affixed to the clowns' costume, and will reportedly spray water when an attached bulb is pressed.