Written by Morse
Print this

Thursday, 3 June 2010

image for Barney Frank On Israel Flap: I May Be Gay, But I'm Not Jewish, At Least Not Right Now!
Barney Blows Off Latest Criticism as "just a little cloud on horizon of life!"

House Banking Chairman Barney Frank, the Democrat from Massachusetts, was forced to backtrack after stating that the US should look into the killing of 'innocents' during the firestorm created around the recent Israeli storming of a flotilla heading to Gaza.

Frank, who has carved out his constituency in Massachusetts, some say his voting district must have been plotted by Patches Kennedy after a 4 day bender, to encompass mostly wealthy and very liberal Jewish voters, now finds himself in hot water with his voting base .

Cynics say Frank, yet another Harvard graduate, openly gay and still sitting in Congress despite his involvement with a gay hooker who he met through a newspaper ad, is a survivor.

Frank moved his lover into his Washington apartment where he then ran an escort service until caught, while Frank escaped censure. Said an aide, "Barney is an astute politician who only gets involved after he tests the political atmosphere to see which way the wind is blowing...he's real good at it!"

With a world outcry led by the UN and muslim countries around the world, plus a tepid response from the White House and the notable absence of Obama's appointee to the UN at emergency meetings, apparently Barney found it politically expedient to deny that he was Jewish. At least temporarily.

Frank who has repeatedly trashed George Bush for the banking melt down despite blocking any and all kinds of mortgage reforms put forth by the previous administration, even going so far as to scoff at reports that Fannie and Freddie, the mortgage institutions were heading for a fall, is now urging Massachusetts Governor Patrick 'Cadillac" Deval to redraw his voting district to include an enclave of Muslims, as well as Obama's Aunt Zeituni Onyango living confortably in a taxpayer funded welfare apartment with additional perks including free cell phone, house cleaning services, and being driven to shopping malls.

Frank recently acclaimed the 6th court decision to allow Obama's relative to remain in the country after being ordered deported 6 years ago, as a 'victory against injustice and Zionist misguided interests!"

Frank has been been elected 13 times to the congressional seat, and until this latest flap was seen as 'unbeatable' as he has never had to spend a dime of the millions of political contributions he has received after running unopposed for much of his political career.

"Nothing bothers Barney," said a long time Massachusetts political voyeur, "he'll just blow this off like everything and everybody else...you just got to remember what state you're in! It really sucks, ya know?"

Make Morse's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 3 plus 3?

3 4 9 6
39 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more