Written by queen mudder
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Topics: sweden

Monday, 26 April 2010

image for Swedish royal wedding bombs as Bush's son Jonas Bergstrom 'shags Norwegian handball star'
The blond Norwegian handball star has taken the rap for Princess Maddie's woes

Sweden - (Stockholm Syndrome): The royal wedding of Princess Madeleine and George W Bush's Swedish son Jonas Bergstrom has been scratched.

Tanned, blue-eyed 31 year-old lawyer Bergstrom has blown it - and all because of a one night stand with luscious blond Norwegian handball - no pun intended! - star Tora 'Bora' Uppstrom Berg.

Explicit reports in Sweden's tabloids this weekend blamed the 21 year-old blond athlete for successfully testing Mr Bergstrom's powers of fidelity at an exclusive Swedish ski resort

The lissom, 36-24-34 Arts University College photography student told reporters that she had 'accidentally' slept with the fiancee of Princess Madeleine Therese Amelie Josephine, Royal Princess of Sweden, Duchess of Halsingland and Gastrikland, to give her full style and title.

It was a simple one night stand where the couple enjoyed each others' magnificent, youthful bodies non-stop for seven or eight hours before before parting later in the full light of day.

"So now you have your proof, Jonas isn't gay." Upptsrom Berg laughed nervously, "At least not with me, he isn't!"

The revelations have shocked the country's royalty watchers, already apoplectic at the scandal of Princess Madeleine's brother - and heir to the Swedish throne - Prince Carl Philip's shagging of a topless reality TV show model.

Monarchists fear that the old adage of bad luck coming in threes may prove true later this summer when Madeleine's sister Crown Princess Victoria and local Stockholm gym owner Daniel Westling marry.

The lavish £9million nuptials have been insured against cancellation. But superstitious underwriters have now demanded a 100% premium hike following this weekend's tragic engagement news.

Bush Twins Jenna and Barbara are 69.

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