Written by Morse
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Tuesday, 20 April 2010

image for Jon & Kate Sex Feud Heats Up as Couple Swaps Intimate Details on Marriage!
Nadya & Kate Plus 22: One Big Happy Family in New Reality Show!

Following exposure concerning his 'wee winky' revealed by one his nubile playmates, wife Kate Gosselin continued the thread confirming the report and revealing her pet nick name for her ex husband Jon: Stubby!

Jon was quick to retort commenting on Kate's wart hog like performance on "Dancing with the Stars', "See...it's like I always said...the Broad just don't have no RHYTHM, man....it was the same in bed...she was always humpin' instead of pumpin'....that's why we had to go the fertility route to have all those freakin' kids!"

Despite her embarrassing attempts to dance on the reality show, even the judges are having a hard time justifying her continued appearances despite Network demands she can't be canned due to an impending new reality show where she moves in with troubled families, and GIVES THEM ADVICE on how to save their marriages!

Said one female contestant who didn't want to be named, but had bigger boobs complained, "The woman is a clutz! She clomps around the set like a Moose in heat, steps all over her partner's feet and hits on all the guys on the set asking 'anyone got one one bigger than 3 inches?' . It's pathetic...I think it's because she's still a frustrated virgin since she said she and Jon were never able to consummate their marriage due to his short comings!"

Meanwhile, Jon who is broke and continues his career in joblessness, has threatened legal action seeking custody of the kids and promising to move to the UK "where a bloke with no job and 8 kids can live comfortably on $65,000 a year thanks to the government!"

Meanwhile in California Octomom Nadya Suleman has offered to share her house with Kate plus the 8 in an effort to forestall foreclosure on her 14 bedroom house which was partially paid for by taxpayers.

Suleman's last ditch effort was aided by the local planning board which rezoned her neighborhood from Residential R-1 to Rural/Agriculture in order to legalize the Breeding Farm which could now comfortably house 22 children with the new addition being planned thanks to Obamacare and Barry's Motherization Program available to single mothers with over 6 kids.

In a teaser for yet another Reality Show, TLC has released a clip showing Nadya and Kate plus 22 involved in an intricate line dancing routine to the tune 'Ain't got no home' by Clarence 'Frogman' Henry.

The premise of the new show is that the girls interview male contestants to see if one is suitable to move in and become a father figure to the kids, while
acting as a sexual surrogate to the pair.

The show's theme song by Henry is quite catchy:

Woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo

Madam, take me in
Let me be your friend
Won't you take me in
Let me be your friend
I'm a lonely boy
I ain't got a home

Woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo

The network announced Nadya and Kate will each be paid $250,000 per episode and hinted Jon may even make a guest appearance where he tries to rekindle his marriage, but winds up doing the Mambo with Nadya and Kate sings the Blues.

Simon Cowell, after viewing the pilot declared it 'tasteless.' "I would never participate in a disgusting show like this taking advantage of mentally challenged individuals....simply horrible!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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