Written by Cuff
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Topics: Russia, Mel Gibson

Friday, 16 April 2010

image for Russia Rescinds All Former Adoptions: Mel Gibson is Heartbroken
Quality Concerns Force Russia To Act!

Megastar and producer Mel Gibson entered a crisis center in California today to deal with the grief of losing his Russian hottie Oksana Grigorieva. The action came from the Russian government announcing that all children adopted from the west must be returned immediately.

The decision follows the upsetting news of the adopted Russian child returned alone on a plane with only a note from the mother pinned on his shirt.

The former Soviet Union has had to deal with a repopulation crisis since the wall fell with a declining birthrate, high alcoholism and all the hot Russian babes taking off for the beach. The overall quality standards of the women that remain are better fit for milking goats and making cheese.

Several attempts have been made to get the Russians to breed which includes offering cash incentives for children born but to no avail.

Compounding the problem is the success of Steven Seagal's chain of notels, 'Fire Down Below' in Thailand which caters to sexual deviates with world wide flair. Apparently the Asian customers who frequent the establishments prefer Russian and American girls and boys and with the recent redistribution of wealth to the east the trafficking of tykes has become one of Russia's prime exports.

Mel Gibson was unable to comment on his tragic loss but rest assured the 'road warrior' will rebound and find another hottie half his age because, well, because he is Mel Gibson.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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