Written by KendoMonkey
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Saturday, 21 June 2003

A blind man in Turesca, Italy, is said to be suing family members following allegations that they would sneak into his room whilst asleep and lick his eyeballs.

The man, aged 63 and blind since birth, was shocked to wake one night and find his daughter licking his eyes. When quizzed she is alledged to have told her father: "It is what we have done for twenty years...you are blind, you do not need your juices. Your tears heal our ails!"

Lawyers for the Blind Man, who we cannot name for legal reasons, have said that he plans to sue each member of his family separately for the damage caused.

"Indeed, we do not know if this tear-stealing is the very cause of his continued lack of sight. For all we know, with the occular-juice he may have regained his sight much sooner."

We'll continue to follow the case in the coming months.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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