Written by Morse
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Saturday, 6 March 2010

image for Spoof Writer in Convalescence After 6 Tabs of Viagra 24 Hours After Penis Extension Leaves him 'dizzy.'
Some of Frankie's Fans Showing the flag to Cheer the Cranky Old Bastard Up!

Army and Marine Doctors, Navy Docs less so, were amazed at the remarkable recovery of Spoof Writer Frankie J after a Booze and Viagra Binge left him Dizzy, only 24 hours after a successful Penis extension enabled him to 'keep up with the boys."

Paramedics were called late last night at the 'New Oasis Bar and Grill', when the grizzled former Navy Corpsman, a veteran of South Viet Nam, San Diego, and Quantico bloody campaigns, lost consciousness due to a sudden rush of blood to his new penis while watching the NAKED icecapade show put on by headliner Ivana Phuque while another 'head liner', Angelina Jolie look a like, sat on his lap performing rigorous rehab.

Despite warnings from his Navy Doctor, Victor Nicholas, who performed the extension operation, the Salty Bastard insisted on raising his expectations at the Oasis in order to enjoy some promised lap dances. He was warned that a premature test drive of his new rod might lead to unintended acceleration, and a sudden loss of blood in his brain, flowing instead to his nether regions.

Frankie, never one hang back as the life of the party, or the reason for one, was being toasted at the Oasis by a group of Satarical Writers who were welcoming him back from a long period of sexual abstinence.

His friend Bert claims Frankie was MIA due to his brief flirtation with being a Hindu Monk while trying to deal with Catholic Guilt associated with memories of squeezing Mary Catherine Kelly's little tit in the cloak room back in 2nd grade. In a Parochial School. With Nuns. In Black Habits!

While he still smiled at the titillating experience, his first with with a 'mackerel snapper', life long problems haunted him with the embarrassment of his 'little pecker' being exposed by Nun Mary Jean O'Malley, placed on his desk, and spanked with a ruler. It was only recently that Frankie was able to have sex with the light on and be able to perform without having his dick hit with a stick.

Speaking to well wishers who had sent cards, flowers, a case of Jim Beam, some Marmite XO and autographed pictures, Frankie remained in character.

"Hey! Why don't youse guys just go FUCK OFF! I'm perfectly fine. But if Madame Bitters is still out in the Hallway, I think I'm feeling faint again.
Think she'd mind coming in and rubbing my joint...it's still a little sore!"

x

Make Morse's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 3 multiplied by 5?

2 19 15 7
55 readers are online right now!

Go to top