Responding to Political Advice from Aide Rahm Emanuel, Obama has decided to act more like Harry Truman than Hugo Chavez in an attempt to resurrect his failing presidency. His first act was to Nuke Toyota, putting 25,000 American factory workers building the popular brand cars out of work.
Obama said he was only acting to prevent more such incidents as reported by Vice President Joe Biden, who has been involved in three (3) motorcade accidents in the last 3 month, resulting in one fatality.
Biden has blamed after market Toyota floor mats inserted in his fleet of Cadillac Escalades for incidents of "sudden acceleration, power steering deficiencies,and slow brake response time."
The one fatality, a Washington Man was struck and killed in a cross walk at 3 a.m. in the morning on a deserted downtown Washington Street. Accident reconstruction indicated the VP's armoured vehicle, weighing 8 tons, was traveling at more than 80 MPG when it struck the obviously confused pedestrian who thought he was safe when in a cross walk and seeing the green lighted 'walk' sign.
Unofficial reports have Biden hustling to get home before his wife woke up and found out he had snuck out after she went to bed in order to meet Chris Dodd at one of Ted Kennedy's favourite watering holes, where they could harass waitresses with impunity.
Obama has demanded that the President of Toyota appear before Congress to be Persecuted, a demand so far unanswered by Toyota officials who said only they may have an answer for the President by Sunday, March 7.
In a completely incidental sales event, Obama is now appearing in GM (Government Motors) ads promising $2500 cash back money for trading in your Toyota for a GM produced car which he assured potential buyers was 'definitely better than purchasing a Yugo from Yugoslavia' referencing that government produced product.
Meanwhile the Secret Service is denying that Biden had demanded he be allowed to drive, and was behind the wheel during all three accidents.
Unreleased photos taken at the scenes show Biden in a racing jump suit laden with beer commercials, and a black baseball cap on backwards with the # 3 emblazoned on it.
NASCAR had no official response to the report.