Written by Daniel Bristol
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Sunday, 14 February 2010

image for Jack and Jill in Domestic Dispute: Jack Hospitalized
Jack and Jill: Dysfunctional Couple?

Mother Goose Land (AP) - The community was shocked today when a tragic accident befell well-known local couple Jack and Jill.

Jack and Jill, sources say went up the hill. Their evident purpose: to fetch a pail of water. Witnesses say they did this quite frequently throughout the course of their relationship, which has been described as "stormy at best".

According to eyewitness testimony, there was a sudden scream as Jack fell down. He was immediately rushed to Humpty Dumpty Memorial Hospital with a broken crown.

Despite rumors to the contrary, Jill did not come tumbling after. She was absent from the scene when authorities arrived and is currently being sought for questioning.

As to whether or not Jill will face assault charges, attorney F. Lee Bailey has insisted upon his client's innocence, claiming that she was having an affair with little Jack Horner, last seen sitting in the corner eating his Christmas pie. "Adultery may be reprehensible," said Bailey, "but it puts my client far from the scene of the accident."

However, Sheriff Puss In Boots told reporters, "We are still looking to speak with Jill concerning this incident."

Jack remains in a coma in the Intensive Care ward, where doctors have given him a 50/50 chance of recovery.

A prayer vigil will be held tonight at the home of the Little Old Woman Who Lives in a Shoe.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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