Arnold Q. Feppish, 79, of the Old Fort Trailer Court, Unit 26, in Palm Bay has recently discovered that startling fact about his older sister Jean and is wondering how he can cash in on it.
"She could have been it," he says. "Definitely, if she'd only been born in China on December 26, 1895, if she'd been a Chinaman, and if she'd had the same parents and the same life experiences and the same name as the actual chairguy Mao Tse Tung, and Arnold has offered a year's free lawn mowing to any homeowner within driving distance who can prove differently."
So far no one has dared to challenge him.
When asked how he came on the discovery he said: "Well one day I was thinkin' gee if I had some ham then I could have some ham and eggs if I had some eggs. Hmm, if, then, if then, if...
"And then I heard like a funny voice from nowheres say "Mao Tse Jean."
At first I thought the voice said Jonathan Livingston Seagull, but then it hit me like a ton of bricks. Funny, huh? My own sister! Jeez!