Written by Skoob1999
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Topics: Pirates, Morse, Cruise

Sunday, 14 February 2010

image for Illustrious Writer Clapped In Irons On Pleasure Cruise
Where's Morse? In The Brig Again. Probably.

Illustrious Tuliptzer prize winning author Morse was this morning sensationally clapped in irons and locked in the brig aboard the cruise ship he was supposedly spending a well earned break on.

Amid widespread confusion at the Captain's breakfast table, the award winning author had to be grappled to the floor and forcibly restrained as he suffered what has been described by the Ship's Doctor as a 'hallucinogenic episode.'

From information we have been able to piece together, it appears that the celebrated wordsmith spontaneously regressed to a previous existence where he had lived a prestigious life as feared pirate, Captain Morse of the Buggerall, the scourge of the Caribbean, last seen in the US Virgin Islands, which have since had to be renamed in the interests of accuracy.

It seems that Morse told the cruise ship's Captain to sit down, as he was taking command of the vessel. He then proceeded to bark out orders to bewildered crew members, telling them to man the guns, get to action stations, and prepare to board.

Which prompted security to spring into action.

The latest we have on this story is that the celebrated writer and one-time 'Pirate Captain' has now calmed down in the brig, and has requested a glass of beer, a cigarette, and a laptop computer so that he can post humorous stories on the internet and access pictures of nubile young ladies with infeasibly large breasts.

It is confidently anticipated that Morse will be released in time for lunch.

Speaking from Portsmouth, England, a close friend of the writer's, one 'Pompey Lil' told that Morse was frequently misunderstood by his peers. It seems he's a lovely guy but a lousy tipper.

More as we get it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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