US President Obama and Nobel Peace Prize winner has told China, "Nuke North Korea or I won't speak to you again!"
China replied, "then don't"
This has led to a chilling of relationships and an eventual "Cold War"!
Obama has asked Taiwan to do it instead and they are quite happy to "Nuke" the North Koreans, "Commy Bastards"!
This has totally pissed the Chinese off because the US are supplying Taiwan with the weapons.
Now the Chinese are not particularly friendly with Tsjang Kai-Sjek-ians so in turn they have stopped delivering Chink Chickens to McDonalds.
This has really turned the heat up and Obama was so insulted that he declared never to buy a black Chinese Dildo again!
Anyway, in the interim jackbooted North-Korean soldiers are preparing for a Taiwan attack and have directed a Jurassic ex-sowjet rocket at the Island and if that succeeds China have promised to supply them with weapons!
A diplomatic flurry led by ex-never won Nobel Peace Prize Tony Blair and ex-Nobel Prize Literature winner for his classic line re a certain biological definition, sex or not sex, feisty ol Bill Clinton has gone to China to console the Chinese.
The US have also stopped importing Mao's little red book until the crisis is over and Obama quoted a famous Chinese proverb:
"Dont fluck with US fley are all Imperialistic bastards, but do sell McDonalds chlinese chlickens, yummi in my tummi, Mao! That'll show em!"