Written by Richard DagNabbit
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Topics: Osama Bin Laden

Sunday, 24 January 2010

image for Osama Bin Laden Caught on Video Tape; Identity "TSA" Verified
War? Do You Mean Money? Now That's What I'm Talkin' About!

Osama Bin Laden has been caught on video tape - in the garage of none other than Pentagon Chief, Blob Yates. An alert neighbor spotted Hillary with Yates in the garage and thought it a unique opportunity to catch the two on video tape. Thinking a little sexual hanky spanky might be going on, what this patriot actually got was more than an eyeful.

After some shuffling around and moving shelved portraits of themselves out of the way, out came Osama Bin Laden! Right there, clear as a bell! A full size replica of OBL, exactly matching the images used by major media outlets every time a story is run where "Osama Claims Responsibility..." Soon after the movie prop was dusted off, the cans of gray spray paint came out and OBL's Beard received a dusting. Instant aging! Then came the Sleek all black SUV's bearing government plates, followed by lightning fast flashes from a bevy of cameras.. and Off they Went! Another sizzling "Breaking News" headline to deflect O'Bomba's New Massive Tax Hikes and add needed fuel to the dwindling Believability Index associated with the "fearsome" Osama Bin Laden image.

Osama, first reported in 2001 as having "escaped" bombing in the Tora Bora Hills of Afghanistan, then reported dead in January of 2002, then reported "possibly alive" in 2003, then reported in various states of flux every year since, and most recently reported as the subject of "no information for many years" by Yates himself, has now been exactingly identified - TSA identification technologies have confirmed that the Osama in the garage is the same Osama presented to the American public in nine out of ten propaganda pieces.

It appears plain that ol' Hillary and Blob have been playing one on us all the way, and with plenty of assistance. What fer you say? Well, boys and girls, as Bernard "I fooled all of ya'" Madoff once said, "you don't have to be too bright to fool a dumbed down public" and as Hillary says "there's damn good money in them wars!"

One Spoofster with a file history on reports put out on the subject over the last ten years, noted that Blob Yates himself once stated to a major news network "if we knew where he is, we'd go and get him". Well, it appears his location has been found and Blob did go and get him... For yet another important mission.

Reporting from the Mad World of Forensic Psychology,

Dagnabbit Rabbitt

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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