Written by Nick Hobbs

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Tuesday, 19 January 2010

image for Bin Laden To Drop 'Bad Boy Image'
Would you like a sweety, little boy? Can I help your grandmother cross the road?

Osama Bin Laden has released a press statement through his underground network, informing the world of plans to 'rebrand' himself.

The statement reads "our client is aware of the recent surge in public opinion against him and his beliefs. He feels it prudent to apologise for any offence made through previous outburst's or action's."

The overhaul in attitude was put into action when Bin Laden slipped down a place, in the OK magazine popularity poll. This put him below Katie Price, something the terrorist could not stand by and ignore.

"We have Gok Wan arriving in due course, a makeover in appearance is just as important as attitude," the statement continued, "Mr Bin Laden is serious about this change, it is not just a false promise."

The statement was sent to us along with several photographs of Mr Bin Laden posing with a small puppy, skipping through tall grass with young children, and handing out soup to the homeless.

This reporter feel's it is unlikely to mask the deaths of thousands at the hands of the beardy wierdy, but it's worth a try in these fickle celebrity worshiping times.

More as we google it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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