Written by Bureau
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Topics: Fat, Gangs

Sunday, 3 January 2010

image for Gang Kills People For Their Fat!
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A gang has been arrested overseas that have been charged with harvesting the body fat of human beings and selling them for cosmetics. Police told UP2 that the gang used the jungle there to hide out after kidnapping fat people who are never seen again.

"There are doctors in the United States and Europe who ask no questions but purchase the fat on the black market", stated Officer Perez. "There is a huge market for it's use in plastic surgery."

There are some on the police force that say that the underground market will pay as much as $50,000 for a gallon of fat.

"Three subjects have confessed to the crimes already", reported Colonel Juan Medja. "They have been charged with killing three people and were caught with two gallons of human fat."

However, a group of medical experts in the United States have came forward since reading the story and say that it is bogus from start to finish.

One physician, who asked not to be identified because of his statement, reported to police officers "This is total bunk! I think it is the Peruvian police who have removed the missing people. Human fat degrades quickly and can't be sold. That's why we usually use the patient's own fat. It needs to be transferred immediately."

So is the story that caught all the headlines a few weeks ago true?

"Fat chance!" says our doctor.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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