Written by Helen Tarnation
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Tuesday, 29 December 2009

image for Seventy-two virgins disappointed in Underwear Bomber
Moslem virgins wear these - but are they safe?

Sources deep inside Muslim headquarters report that 72 virgins are 'very disappointed' in the performance of Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab, who is alleged to have tried to blow up a Northwest Airlines flight from Amsterdam to Detroit on Christmas Day.

The unnamed virgins also call Abdulmutallab 'a failure'.

'He just wanted to get his rocks off', said one virgin.

'He couldn't get it up', said another.

'Impotent', said a third.

According to allegations, Abdulmutallab attempted to detonate a bomb sewn into his underwear while Flight 253 was coming in for a landing.

'We heard the whole thing fizzled when he tried to scratch his balls', said a fourth virgin, who also refused to be named.

'Disgusting', she added.

A fifth virgin expressed hope that Tiger Woods would convert to Islam.

'Tiger Woods knows how to take care of the ladies', she said. 'And if he can do fourteen non-virgins, the 72 of us could definitely keep him busy.'

Make Helen Tarnation's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this


Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 2 multiplied by 3?

5 14 6 11

Go to top