Written by victor nicholas
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Topics: Afghanistan

Tuesday, 29 December 2009

image for Scottish Special Services To Afghanistan
Commander Fergus McFaddie

President Obama has complimented Great Britain for providing Scottish Special Forces to assist with prisoner interrogation at high security Gitmo prison camp in Cuba.

The crack Scottish Troops were called upon to provide a replacement for waterboarding and have proved more effective than anticipated in encouraging confessions by the use of extended bagpipe treatments. The treatments have been criticized for being excessively cruel by UN observers with some prisoners begging to be waterboarded rather than being forced to listen another rendition of the Battle of Killiecrankie.

The Prime Minister has told president Obama that he will send Scottish Special Forces to Afghanistan to support troops already on the ground there as well.

Gordon Brown says the Scottish Forces plan on driving around the mountain lair of Al Qaeda with megaphone trucks blaring Amy Macdonald songs to lure out the enemy who they hope to catch dancing.

Once the enemy is sighted the Special Forces will surprise them with an updated version of the Highland Charge which commander Fergus McFaddie describes as an ambush maneuver. Forces have been outfitted with special camouflage tartan kilts and trained not to rattle their broadswords or halberds until they are a minimum of two hundred yards from the enemy before letting out their battle cry and rushing forward as a surging Celtic horde.

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