Written by Jaggedone
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Topics: Monkey, Banana

Tuesday, 15 December 2009

image for The "Banana Wars" are now officially over and the Monkees won!
The "Banana Wars" are now over thanks to Bubbles and Sir Bananaby Fyffe!

The "Banana Wars" in Europe, Africa and South America have been going on since 16 years (longer than WW1 and WW2 together) and at last peace has been officially declared.

The wars started off when wicked, evil banana conglomerates attempted to steal the main food of our closest relatives, monkeys, Gorillas and other apes.

They in turn formed armies (after watching fab B film, Planet of the Apes 1) and in those 16 years when Del Monte and Fyffes workers have attempted to pick bananas they were bombarded with yellow WOMD's, ape pee and turds.

This obviously led to a banana shortage and a catastrophic price war between Africa, South America and Europe!

Commonsense has at last prevailed and Monkees, led by that famous chimpanzee, Bubbles, gorilla, baboon and other ape leaders decided to meet the CEO's of Fyffes, del Monte and other major banana "nickers" in that infamous banana republic El Salvador, for a peace meeting and an end to this ridiculous conflict!

It has been agreed that all of our nearest relatives will be allocated substantial banana reservations and no greedy bastard banana conglomerates will ever be allowed to steal bananas there!

The peace treaty was signed by Bubbles (ex Michael Jackson soul-bed mate with nappy on) and his counterhand Sir Bananaby Fyffe, great, great grandson of English slave -driver, banana dealer and banana plantation owner, Sir Bananaby Hornblower Fyffe.

They all celebrated, got pissed, kissed and hugged with a banana cocktail, called "slip on skin special!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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