Written by OIF2Sniper
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Tuesday, 15 December 2009

image for Al Gore Releases Statement On Global Warming.
Al Gore: Slamming The Door Shut On Global Warming

Bermuda Triangle- Al Gore today released a press statement pointing the cause of global warming to an overlooked culprit.

"Today the scientific community has rallied together to to try and save humanity in this our final hour." said Mr.Gore. The statement then continued with, "The Dutch underground can no longer discount the overwhelming evidence as it is to be presented before the world. Today we have discovered the culprits who have literally left the door open for global warming to destroy our protective ozone barrier and in time the destruction of all life on this planet."

"As sad as I am to say it , our children are responsible for our planets demise. When we were growing up, our parents repeatedly told us not to leave the door open because we were letting the heat out. Now we are reaping the consequences of our irresponsible, disobedient children. As Nobel Prize winning president Obama has said we can no longer keep our thermostats at 70 degrees and expect there to be no consequences."

World leaders have called for an immediate climate summit to discuss the possible fines, levees, taxes and penalties they can impose to counter this latest "inconvenient truth".

As part of Al Gores latest heroics for our planet he will be receiving an honor usually bestowed upon the most charitable and deceased persons. On the 21st of December 2012 the Vatican announced they will announce Al Gore the first living Saint.

Upon receiving the news of his latest honor at his mansion in Bermuda, St.Gore immediately took his Hummer limousine down to his luxury yacht, which took him to his private airstrip, boarded his personal jet and flew to Italy for breakfast before meeting in Africa to discuss population redistribution.

It seems that the National Academies for Science in an agreement with the UN have came to the conclusion that repopulating the Arctic with melanin rich humans should absorb a majority of the heat coming from the sun. By displacing solar heat that will allow the ice to remain intact and prevent global flooding.

They say if the effort succeeds it will be the first time blacks moving into a predominately white area will make the world a better place.

Make OIF2Sniper's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 3 plus 2?

9 5 1 6
69 readers are online right now!

Go to top