Written by Morse
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Topics: vagina

Thursday, 12 November 2009

image for Search for World's Most Beautiful Vagina Takes World's Most Interesting Man To South Carolina On Snatch Quest!
YES! Fernando Looks for Lips Like These...only lower!

The area is electric with the news that eccentric recluse, noted satyr and voyeur, Fernando Monte Verde, The World's Most Interesting (& irresistible) Man was coming to the Grand Strand on a talent search for the woman with the World's Most Beautiful Vagina.

Not since the chicken processing plant was shut down after an ICE raid which netted 350 illegal chicken pluckers, has more excitement been generated with a public announcement that the Golf Capitol of the South East Coast, could lose yet more of it's local talent!

Monte Verde, winner of over $135M in a recent realty show sponsored by a vaginal itching creme and chap stick, will be arriving sometime this week on his 100' sailing yacht, The Cunning Linguist, with home port listed as Bermuda.

Monte Verde, the buff 60 something, grey bearded multi millionaire, has been on a world wide quest in search of the woman with the world's most beautiful vagina, some say a dream that will never be fulfilled.

In some literary circles El Senor Monte Verde has been ridiculed being called the Don Quixote of Pussy lore.

According to an on board source, Monte Verde has come close many times in finding his perfect pubic fantasy, and while he has not yet found the perfect one, he certainly is not complaining as he has sampled many of the world's finest pretenders.

Our source thought that recently Fernando had found his dream during a brief stop in Portsmouth, UK, when he interviewed a most interesting woman who was born with two (2) vaginas. Unfortunately, upon further inspection, it was found that both vaginas sported hair lips....a definite turn off for Fernando!

A spokesman for Fernando, also stated, to clarify the issue for contestants who want to interview for the title, that their Vaginas must be pure, and not trimmed, sculpted, or enhanced with Labioplasty, a new designer procedure that more and more women seem to be having, at the cost of over $5,000.

Interviews are being conducted at a local biker hangout prior to Fernando's arrival in a rather festive air. A new local performing troupe, 'Morse's Magnificent Muffettes" will be performing a series of heart stopping, stomp ass pole dancing routines guaranteed to leave the primarily out of work male audience with their jaws gaping.

UK gynecologist Dr. Victor Nicholas will be on hand to certify the veracity of all Vaginas entered into the contest, to insure that no artificial enhancement has taken place. All contestants will be required to sign a confidentiality agreement concerning their participation, and further confidentiality should they actually win the contest and be signed to a long term personal services contract by El Senor Monte Verde.

As one amateur attorney said, anticipating the contest and his viewing pleasure: "Loose Lips Could Sink the Ship!"

Make Morse's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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