Written by foshizzle
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Thursday, 5 November 2009

image for Bill O'Reilly Fires Broadside at "Comrade Obama"
Barack Obama

Popular Fox "News" Commentator Bill O'Reilly launched an astonishing attack on American President Barack Obama today.

"The Russians and the Chinese have less regulation and more freedom of trade than we do. If I was dying of heart disease, and could afford to buy a new one, why should I be stopped? I'm sure I'd be able to get a quality heart in Russia or China, but according to Comrade Obama it should be the business of the State, who gets the hearts and who dos not".

Free trafficking of body organs did not even seem to be O'Reilly's main gripe.

"They even have the nerve to give that guy the Nobel Prize for Peace? AM I NOT PEACEFUL ENOUGH? I'VE GIVEN UP MY ENTIRE LIFE TO MAKE THIS COUNTRY A BETTER PLACE. DO I GET ANY RECOGNITION? F**K NO", O'Reilly ranted.

"If we had managed to deny the African Americans the vote, like we did in Florida before G.W's first term, (and for the first couple of centuries after the country was founded) we would not be in this mess. I love this country, I really do but I would prefer to live in China, and be beaten to within an inch of my life, than put up with the rational and free thinking liberal agenda that we are being forced to swallow by educated men like Obama".

While O'Reilly was making his strong remarks, he was, without his knowledge, being recognized for his work by most of the Western World. A new award for the stupidest man to have even been allowed into the political sphere since George.W.Bush was presented to him in absentia.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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