In France, an Algerian man (34, Algerian) has been held under the French terror directive; normally used for Algerians suspected of being nuclear scientists.
The French Interior minister made a statement, "He's been accused of being in possession of Algrerian Onions which can be used to make illegal French onion soup.
"We French are known for eating anything; Horse, Snails, Human Flesh, haw haw haw!
"Actually I'm just kidding, we really don't eat Snails, that's just a myth!
"But this is a travesty! To produce illegal French onion soup is abhorrent to all French people who would rather die than eat fake soup! This is why we have invoked the French terror directive."
A spokesman for the French police said, "We actually went to his apartment looking for berms. After searching we found no berms but we did find a secret stash of Algerian onions in his kitchen cupboard, Sac re bleu!"
He added, "He's been treated very fairly. We gave him a beating in his apartment and a beating on the way to the police station and after we got to the police station we gave him another beating. We French love a good beating, haw haw haw!"
A UK Travel Agent puts things into perspective, "You can't piss about with the French when it comes to their national soup.
He explains, "It's like having sex with your neighbour's dog and then showing your neighbour the photos; in a decent society, it's just not done.
"If you're going to have sex with your neighbour's dog, for gods sake keep it a secret!"