Written by Paris Silton
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Saturday, 10 October 2009

image for Obama Wins Nobel Prize and a New Category is Born - the Award for Nothing
The Nobel Prize for Nothing was established in honor of Barack Obama's achievements

Stockholm, Sweden -- Joining the ranks of Physicists, Chemists, Physiologists/Medical Doctors, Writers and Pacifists will be another discipline of Nobel Prize recipients: Nothingists.

The new category, known officially as the Nobel Prize for Nothing, has been specifically established to honor the achievements of President Barack Obama of the United States of America.

It has been 30 years since a new award was added to the existing categories of Physics, Chemistry, Physiology or Medicine, Literature, and Peace. Not since the Sveriges Riksbank Prize in Economic Sciences in Memory of Alfred Nobel, which was introduced by Sweden's Central Bank in 1968 and awarded in 1969, has there been a category associated with the original five, which were founded in 1901.

Rather than recognizing actual achievement, the Nobel Committee praised Obama's achievement in Nothing. "We trust that this award will strengthen his commitment, as the leader of the most powerful nation in the world, to continue promoting Nothing," the foundation's statement read.

"Only furry rarely has a person captured zee vourld's attenshun und given its people-a hope-a fur a better future-a to zee same extent as Obama has fur doing Nothing-a," Thor Larsson, chairman of the Nobel Committee, said.

President Obama responded to the news, saying he was "surprised and deeply humbled" by the decision to create a new category just for him.

He said the award was "an affirmation of the progress my administration has made, which is Nothing," calling it "a recognition that I have accomplished Nothing."

Acknowledging that the award is universally regarded as the most prestigious award one can receive in the field of Nothing, Obama vowed to continue to heed its "call to action" and use the honor to "strengthen my agenda of Nothing."

Along with the Nobel Prizes and the Prize in Economics, the Prize for Nothing will be presented in Stockholm, Sweden, at the annual Prize Award Ceremony on the 10th of December, the anniversary of the death of Alfred Nobel, the founder of the Prizes.

Michelle Obama is excitedly planning her wardrobe for the award ceremonies and the accompanying banquets, which are typically major international events. "He may be doing nothing, but I'm not!" the first lady squealed as she dived into a stack of Ikram and J. Crew catalogs.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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