Written by Jaggedone
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Topics: Wayne Rooney, fossil

Thursday, 1 October 2009

image for Human-like fossil "Ardi" proves that Wayne Rooney is a human being
Rooney relative "Ardi" the human-like fossil once played his footy 4 million years ago here!

A human-like fossil found in Ethiopia, which was traced back 4 million years has now been linked to Wayne Rooney.

Scientists have been tracing the fossil from way back when up till today and are convinced the "missing link" has been found between Rooney and "Ardi".

Apparently this particular human-like species wandered the planet roughly 4 million years ago, hitched a ride on a passing by floating log near Le Havre in France and ended up in Liverpool.

Traces of the ancestors of this particular species are to be found on council estates all over Liverpool nowadays they're called "Ard Scouse Hooligans" and Roonie's astonishing likeness to a computer replica of "Ardi" has come up trumps.

Rooney gladly donated the scientists some DNA, his spit found after a Man U game against Liverpool at Anfield after he missed Gerrard.

Now the link has been established and an explanation about Roonies "human-ape-like" appearance has been scientifically proven, Rooney descends from "Ardi" the human-like fossil found in Ethiopia.

Wayne is over the moon abpout finding his ancestors and has donated his Ethiopian relatives $20 million and a season ticket at Everton, Man Utd's were sold out.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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