(Houston TX)-- The Hubble Space Telescope is sending back incredibly beautiful pictures of a fat, juicy turd from Outer Space. The stunning photos show a turd, almost 8 million miles long, floating serenely by Uranus. Photos of the glittering, glistening piece of shit have amazed billions of Internet users around the world for days.
"Oh, how beautiful it is, how adorable." exclaimed President Obama at his morning news conference. "I just want to eat it up! Michelle and I have been gazing at the fat, juicy turd for hours. It's almost as beautiful as Michelle!" he boasted.
Other world leaders were also eager to sing their praises about the fat, juicy turd.
"Let us adore this turd!" ordered Pope Benedict XVI in Rome. "It might have been crapped by God Himself!" said the Pontiff. He began to chant a prayer to the Holy Turd.
"Hail Turd, full of grace, the Lord crapped thee, blessed art thou amongst turds!" he chanted in German.
Late breaking news from NASA identifies the turd as rap-star Kanye West! The crazy singer had his ass kicked so hard that he left Earth's orbit. There are no rescue plans.