Beijing, China/ International Fiduciary News - China's International Finance Minister, Hu Nhu, sounded a serious financial alarm today with the news that for the first time in 3 decades, the US Treasury Department was printing more $100 Bills than Rogue State North Korea.
Minister Nhu attributed the aberration to the economic policies of the Obama Administration who he said were busy 'spending tomorrows money today!"
North Korea has long been known to have stolen valuable printing plates from the US mint and also acquiring the valuable printing paper rights from a Pakistani importer who also supplied the needs of the Treasury Department.
An internal investigation by the Government Accounting Office, as well as the FBI, determined the theft was accomplished by giving free reign to delivery employees of a Chinese-American fast food restaurant located around the block from the government's printing plant.
A complex search of real estate records traced ownership to an LLC with Corporate Officers including Nancy Pelosi, Harry Reid, Charles Wrangel (sic), and 3 of Joe Biden's Foster children.
The FBI said the 6 year on going investigation has been hampered by the ACLU who claimed investigators were using 'racial profiling', despite the fact the thieves had left their DNA on discarded egg role wrappers found in the vault where the plates were stored.
Contributing to the slow resolution of the case were the alleged ties of the 5 Emanuel Brothers appointed as Czars within the Obama Shadow Government.
According to reports, not yet released, the Brothers, also known as 'The Chicago Brotherhood' with ties to the Israeli Mafia, also controlled the paper contracts with the Pakistani company, now proven to be an empty shell.
Payments for the special paper, invoices now total at least $1B, were routinely paid and sent to a vacant store front in New Orleans, also the address of record for ACORN, the Presidents Personal Fan Club, Political Action Arm, Census Taker, and Personal Security Force.
As an Indication of just how serious the allegations are, DEA agents report the International Drug cartels including those in Venezuela, Columbia, Mexico, Afghanistan, Laos, Detroit, Oakland, and Brighton Beach, are refusing to take payments in US cash.
Revenues are up at American Express, Visa and Master Card, mostly on their Black, Platinum and Depleted Plutonium Cards. American Express just announced, due to unprecedented demand, their new WOW card, indicating carriers had a net worth in excess of $500B.
Reacting to the potential economic meltdown of 'the dollar', President Obama has made a special plea to the United Nations to allow him to surrender use of the dollar in exchange for the issuance of a new 'international currency'.
Said Venezuela Narco Dictator Hugo Chavez,, "See, I told you I liked that 'darkman'...we think alike, him and me. This is the first move in the eventual reunification of ALL the Americas!"
Oliver Stone, fresh off his documentary worshipping Chazez,said he is in preproduction on "Obama, The New Top Banana". Early odds on role casting see Sean Penn as the Mega Maniac Obama, and Madonna as Michelle.