New York, NY/ Shotgun News - The government pursuit and harassment of Bargis Tryhol, Man with the World's Largest Penis, continued unabated with his announced arrest after an "accidental discharge" of an "unlicensed weapon" early this morning on the city's west side.
According to his publicist, Buck W. Wheat, Bargis was attending the debut of a personal favorite pole dancer whose career he had an interest in promoting after he had rescued her from what the tabloids called "an unfortunate west coast relationship involving demonic control."
The entertainer, stage name Foxy Roxy, apparently caused a near riot from approving fans and her performance was described as 'Smokin' Hot' by pole dance critic and sometime performer Madame "Kitty" Bitters who flew in from Texas for the debut, and as a favor to Bargis.
According to eye witness accounts, during an especially rousing rendition of cult favorite "I just want to make love to you," accompanied with appropriate suggestive and visual dance movements, Bargis' love gun went off.
Wheat, his constant companion and business manager said "when "Bargis is on the move, he's always 'cocked and locked' in case anything comes up!"
Unfortunately, a Justice Department Official shadowing Bargis since Attorney General Eric Holder had issued a cease and desist order concerning Bargis's proximity to the President, witnessed the event, called the local cops and aided in the arrest which took place at an all night dry cleaners and before the evidence of the mishap could be destroyed.
Tabloids were a twitter following the event, especially since it closely followed the sentence of a pro football player who got 2 years for accidentally shooting himself in the leg after his Glock Discharged when he attempted to adjust his Johnson before participating in a Limbo Contest.
Bargis has since been "bailed", and is out on a $250 Surety Bond issued by Female Night Court Judge Pricilla Knightly after a private interview in chambers. The prosecutor is said to be "bull shit", but the Judge in no uncertain terms told him to either "get over it, or return to the West Coast,girly man!"
NYC court watchers are predicting that the case will be dismissed without prejudice, or at the worst, Bargis will be issued a GPS Cock Ring so the Judge "can keep the eye of justice on him!"
This latest event just reached 1m hits on Google, and Bargis Tryhol appearance fee money was hiked to $250,000, treated as a tax free contribution to his sex education library in Petersville, Fl., but being contested by the IRS after complaints from Rep. Charles Wrangle and Rev. Al Sharpton said their non profit contributions "were way off..."