Written by Morse
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Topics: Michael Jackson

Friday, 21 August 2009

image for Dubai Tourist Minister: We Bought Jocko's Bod! Museum and Road Tour to Follow!
Architectural Drawing of Proposed Michael Jackson Musuem Set for Dubai

The Dubai Minister of Tourism confirmed today what had only been hinted at in an earlier report, that Executors of the Michael Jackson estate had chosen to maximize their investment by selling rather than burying their brethren, classified by accountants as "Fully Depreciated Toxic Waste."

Sheik Ari Von Mahadeen said in a fierce bidding war pitting international strongmen Vladmir Putin and Hugo Chavez against the sheer volume of cash available to Dubai interests, it was simply NO CONTEST.

This latest acquisition to the odd collection of memorabilia already collected by Sheik Ali Mahatoon says that Dubai is betting on an economic turn around in the near future.

Sources say a MJ museum will be built adjacent to the berth in which aging icon ocean liner Queen Mary 2 is now resting awaiting "Arab Restoration" defined as an oxymoron in the english language.

Bought for L100m the regal queen was supposed to be converted to a hotel convention center, but recent work has been curtailed due to an Arab cash flow problem.

Mahadeen said the purchase of Michael Jackson's remains was a much better short term investment as they plan to put the body on a world wide tour starting in the UK as a replacement act for the live 50 show sell out previously committed to by the Investment Bankers of Jackson LLC.

Mahadeen also added from the economical side, the restoration of the body would be a lot cheaper than the other Queen, as only his nose needed to be restored to its regal splendor.

Escrowed funds from those UK shows are now moving into Dubai banks despite protests from fans who would not pay to see MJ alive, but are clamoring to see him Dead.

According to MJ Watcher Skoob 1999 the Spoof Entertainment Editor in the UK, scalpers are now demanding, and getting, four times the already paid for price to see the live events.

Said the irreverent scribe, "Fooking Fools...wouldn't pay a farthing to see me do my bicycle tricks, but they pay 500 quid to see a dead poofer!"

A spokesman for the Jackson family estate said the burial of the dead black man found earlier in Michael's Casket would go ahead as planned. That lucky dude has been identified as Rodney "Hot Rod" Johnson, a down and out former NBA star whose fortunes fell after being involved in 27 paternity suits, 30 palimony suits, 7 DUI's, $25m in unsecured debt and being removed from his Beverly Hills Mansion and losing his sneaker endorsements.

As soon as Hot Rod's remains are put to rest his jersey will be retired to the NBA hall of fame and there will be a moment of silence during the first round of the playoffs.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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