It's official: it's a man's world. Researchers at the University of Calcutta have completed a 5-year study into the control of Earth by various sectors of humankind. Their findings show that men dominate, closely followed by women, then old people and then finally babies.
"Everywhere you go you can see signs of this dominance", said the lead researcher, Dr. Prachet Gujaral, "they put a man on the Moon, you see sign posts saying 'Men at Work', - these are just some examples we have seen in our own studies.
"In shops you see MANnequins. People are refered to as 'huMAN beings'. Wings sang about a 'MAN on the run'. Why not a woman? Why?!"
"Even the name 'woman' is just 'man' with a 'wo' put in front of it", he added, its just fucking unfair really, isn't it?"
Old people are represented by 'Old Spice' aftershave whilst babies have a smaller degree of influence and only feature in novelty car-signs like 'Baby on Board' and 'Worlds Cutest Baby'.