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Tuesday, 14 July 2009

image for Michael Jackson's body rejected by science
One of the thousands of candles planned to be made from Michael Jackson's face

Michael Jackson's final request before he "Beat It" was that his body should be left to science.

However, for the first time ever in its thoudand-year history, science today rejected a bequeathed body when it turned Jackson's body away at the gates of the Institute for Body Disease Research in Dallas, Texas.

Speaking from the downtown branch of the Dallas Bank, where he had hoped to make a substantial deposit from the Institute, Michael Jackson's father Stonewall was said to be disappointed.

He said it was nearly as bad as the time Sir Alex Ferguson's local newsagent ran out of chewing gum.

A spokesperson from the Institute confirmed that they had indeed refused the body. She went on to say that the American health and Safety Executive had refused permission on the basis of the body being a fire hazard threat to employees.

She said that unfortunately, the singer had undergone so much plastic surgery, that there was a chance the cadaver could spontaneously combust in the laboratory environment within the institute, and that it was a risk they couldn't afford to take for staff safety reasons.

The Ohio Candle Company have since expressed interest in the body.


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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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