Written by Hydrogen Balloon
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Tuesday, 7 July 2009

image for Michael Jackson's Gold Coffin Repossessed
Here Comes The Repo Man!

Los Angeles CA-- There was a lot of tears outside the Stapler Center after today's Michael Jackson funeral. The dead King of Pop's golden coffin was repossessed by the bank. Michael's corpse was unceremoniously ripped out of the coffin and dumped in the parking lot by the repo man.

There weren't any treasures left after the king croaked, only liens and bills and bills and bills. The gold coffin will help to pay an outstanding debt of $500,000.00 for cosmetic surgery that was never paid. The Jackson estate still has over $7 billion in debt.

All the tears outside the Stapler Center came from Michael's creditors. The nasty creditors were upset with damage to the coffin. It lost almost $100,000.00 in value because of Michael's putrid stench. The family was too cheap to pay for any embalming.

No one bothered to pick up Michael's remains from the parking lot. Crows and rats soon ate the meager feast, except for the plastic nose.

Someone came by and kicked the plastic nose into the gutter, and no one ever thought of Michael Jackson ever again!

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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