Written by Blazing Saddle
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Topics: Tax, Farting

Monday, 6 July 2009

image for International Flatulence Tax Announced
Taxpayer Straining Every Sinew In Tax Avoidance Effort

In a bid to reduce the threat posed by methane emissions, the G8 Summit will today hear from the British Chancellor of the Exchequer.

Alistair Dearest will announce an international agreement to impose a Flatulence Activated Recycling Tax to be brought in from 1 April 2010.

The FART tax will be collected to offset methane emissions in the same way that air travellers can salve their carbon consciences by planting a little tree every time they fly.

All mammalian anuses are to be installed with FART collection devices that will be emptied and weighed at Regional Economy Flatulence Activated Recycling Tax Centres (REFARTCENS) that will be set up and operated under licence from a new quango to be known as OFF-FART.

A new Chief Executive Officer will be appointed. The government candidate for FART Czar is not yet known.

A spokesman for the Civil Liberties oversight organisation, OFFWATCHTHESEBASTARDS, stated "This tax leaves a bad smell. We call upon every right-thinking individual to strain every muscle not to add to the governments' coffers".

It is expected that special arrangements will be made for collection of the emissions from Germany and Belgium.

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